The Home Stretch

It wasn't easy.

In between helping my sister move to her beautiful new home, going to concerts with my brother, wake surfing with Brian, moto-crossing with Tyler, private track-days and fancy golf resorts with Rob, I've actually found some time to pack and organize my life.

I really had a blast back here in the States, and especially Arizona. When it comes to friends, I feel like I never left AZ; everyone is warm and welcoming and we haven't skipped a beat. It is really nice to fit in somewhere, to feel comfortable and to have good company. I think I made good use of my time too - I managed to update my resume and save some cash working a great job in Chicago, plus I got to tour the US in a little red racecar. I spent time with my Father in PA and made some new friends along the way. I believe this trip back to the US was just as important and fulfilling as any other leg of my travels. But alas, it is time to go - which seems to bring on a host of emotions.

I am ready and excited to start a new challenge in Amsterdam. I am hopeful and prepared to make my life there just as meaningful as it is here. I am looking forward to the opportunity of making new friends, gaining new hobbies, and doing work that is rewarding.

So on Monday it all begins. Monday I will throw myself in the deep end and see if I can swim. Monday I will say goodbye to my comfort zones and begin working harder than I've ever worked before. Monday is the day.

Here I come - or go - again.

Not So Far From Victory

Today's inspiration...

The Road Ahead or The Road Behind
by George Joseph Moriarty
Sometimes I think the Fates must
Grin as we denounce and insist
The only reason we can’t win
Is the Fates themselves that miss

Yet there lives on an ancient claim
We win or lose within ourselves
The shining trophies on our shelves
Can never win tomorrow’s game
You and I know deeper down
There’s always a chance to win the crown

But when we fail to give our best
We simply haven’t met the test
Of giving all, and saving none
Until the game is really won

Of showing what is meant by grit
Of fighting on when others quit
Of playing through, not letting up
It’s bearing down that wins the cup
Of taking it and taking more
Until we gain the winning score

Of dreaming there’s a goal ahead
Of hoping when our dreams are dead
Of praying when our hopes have fled
Yet losing, not afraid to fall
If bravely, we have given all

For who can ask more of a man
Than giving all within his span
Giving all, it seems to me
Is not so far from victory

And so the Fates are seldom wrong
No matter how they twist and wind
It is you and I who make our fates
We open up or close the gates
On the road ahead or the road behind.

One Month To Go

It's been getting quite cold here in Chicago as of late, and even though I am not prepared for the weather I have been enjoying myself as usual. Besides, it gives me reason to wear my favourite suit; the jacket is quite warm. And I've finally grown tired of driving all the way into the city regularly, so I've made some new friends out in the 'burbs for when I just feel like having a drink with a friendly face. Turns out these midwest country folk know how to have fun too.

Of course I haven't slowed down at work, in fact I've probably picked up the pace because I almost feel criminal for leaving my wonderful employer. I'd really like to be able to finish the project I am working on, but as with many corporate gigs the project continues to become larger and more unwieldy with each meeting or conference call. None the less, I show up on time each day and put in my best effort with a smile. I've yet to hear if they plan to get a replacement who I can help to ease the transition, but with only two weeks to go I hope they're making progress.

Home life has been getting a bit hectic lately as well, my amazing hosts are going through some rough patches with family health, so I've been doing my best to pitch in whatever help I can. Unfortunately I'm not too great with 4 year olds, and so I urge them not to trust me all alone with theirs. But they've also been gearing up for a big move, so today we painted a few rooms and began getting this house ready for renters. Tools I understand - 4 year olds bewilder me. They treated me to a wonderful dinner at a gourmet Mexican joint to say thank you. Of course it wasn't necessary, I don't think they realise just how grateful I am to them for letting me live a life of luxury in their beautiful piece of suburbia. But it's a bit sad to be leaving, they've become great friends of mine as well so it was good to spend some time just relaxing at one of their favourite spots.

And of course in between all of this I am still finding time to continue making my way to Europe. It's been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster since day one, sometimes I really feel like I'm on the top of the world, and nothing could possibly go wrong. I've got the right attitude, I feel like I've done my due diligence, and I know I am good at my job. Other days I wonder why the hell I am even considering such a task, I mean, do I really even want to go to Europe? It's not like I've ever been there. I envision sleepless nights wondering if anyone will want to hire me. Shit, sometimes I envision the possibility that there won't even be jobs available, and I'll simply remain stationary, stuck running on a hamster wheel working hard without any progress to show for it. Of courser I try to talk myself out of this menatality, I try and remind myself how I felt yesterday when I was on top of the world, but then the other host of issues arises, like bank accounts, mobile phones, living arrangements, making friends, regaining hobbies - and it all seems a little overwhelming to attempt all by myself. Who the hell am I anyway?

And now is when I give you my progress report - but I must warn you - there hasn't been much progress.

The one place that I have come a long way is in the realm of contacts, my friends in Europe have been helping me out so much, sometimes I feel like they are working harder than I. Amazing folks have been really sticking their neck out, either sending my CV around to colleagues and acquaintances or volunteering their family members to help me with simple matters such as mobile phones and bank accounts. It's this confidence and assurance that has really kept me going, and I can't wait to fulfill their expectations of living a happy and successful life in Europe.

Thanks, you all know who you are.